Living Life at Human Scale
- Kim Reindl
- Jan 20
- 10 min read
Updated: Feb 13
TOUCHSTONE: Presence
Be Present as Fully as Possible. Make space and show up. Be here with your doubts, fears and failings, as well as your convictions, joys and successes, your listening as well as your wondering, your heart and body, as well as your mind.
What does it mean to live life at “human scale?”
Two and a half years ago, my husband, Darren, and I hiked the Dingle Way, a path that runs 100+ miles around the Dingle peninsula on the western coast of Ireland. Every day we set out, hiking boots laced, water bottles filled, and absolutely no idea of what the day would hold.
The hike itself was not easy. Basically, all we knew before beginning the pilgrimage trail was what I had found through my online research and the information in a guidebook I bought on Amazon. Unlike the Camino de Santiago that we had walked a few years earlier, the Dingle way is a lesser known and considerably less traveled path.
Before the hike I had made reservations for our nightly accommodations. The goal for each day was to make it from one town to the other, from the place we had laid our heads the night before to the place we would lay our heads that coming night. The guidebook gave a general idea of how long the walk would be for each day. Or so we thought. The plan was to walk 10 to 14 miles a day. We soon discovered that the guidebook, as well as the locals, had a loose interpretation of distance. What we thought was to be a 10 mile hike often turned out to be 13 or 14 miles. On the rare occasion that we passed other humans along the way—our usual companions were the sheep and the cows—we would ask something like, “How much longer to Ballydavid?” to which we would be told with generous hospitality, “Oh…It’s just over the hill a ways!” Eight miles later we would find ourselves dragging into the town at nightfall!
You would think after a couple of days we would have learned and adjusted for the “loose” interpretation of distance. We did not! We set out each day with enough water, but minimal amounts of food. Not once did we pack a lunch! We kept thinking, “Surely we will come across a café or a restaurant.” Yet each day nothing but rolling green—oh so green—hills filled with wildflowers, wooden fences with rusty wires covered in blackberries, blue sky with fluffy gray clouds gathering and parting, gathering and parting, and of course, the sheep and the cows, the sheep and the cows, always the sheep and the cows. Over the 10 days of hiking, I think we only found a place for lunch twice. There were days when we must have looked hungry because the cows seemed to be giving us warning looks to keep away from their cud!
At night, whenever we arrived at the inn or B&B, we were starving! Usually the owner would politely ask if we had eaten. When we responded “No.” they would rush to the phone to beg the one local pub in town to keep the kitchen open. I remember the time when we arrived at the Farmhouse B&B, An Riasc. Denise, the owner, informed us that the local pub had closed down and that the closest place for food was in a town a few miles away. Before my heart and stomach could sink, Denise got on the phone and asked the pub to keep the kitchen open. Yet, because the pub was too far for us to walk at night, she also proceeded to get her son to drive us to dinner. After dinner, that same daring 20-year-old once again whipped around multiple blind curves on the seemingly one lane road to retrieve us. Furthermore, the next day when we decided to explore the area, Denise gave us a ride to the next town. When we couldn’t cross Mount Brandon a day later because of the weather, her husband gleefully drove us around the mountain, stopping along the roadside allowing us time to step out and take in the views.
Time after time, the generosity of the Irish people amazed me. There was the day when Darren and I walked for miles in the pouring rain. I had bought gaiters for the trip (a kind of plastic cuff that is made to keep water from rolling down your pant leg into your hiking boot) but failed to put them on early enough. With every step I could feel the squish of my thick wool socks. After hours of squishing our way along the path, we finally arrived at a café (one of the two lunch spots I mentioned). We were drenched and more than ready for relief! The hostess sat us at a table by the doorway where we could puddle…there were literally puddles of water collecting on the floor beneath our feet. Within moments we were made comfortable with warm bowls of soup and hot cups of coffee. Given the uninviting prospect of the road ahead, we decided to ask if there was a local taxi that could take us the additional 3 miles to our lodging. A few minutes later, our server returned to tell us that the owner of the completely full café had offered to drive us. “Take your time,” she said. “Whenever you are ready, she’ll pull the car around.”
The generosity and hospitality of the people we encountered was abundant…and so was the joy! The people seemed to possess a kind of presence of human spirit that invited spontaneous joy. People would show up night after night at the local restaurant or pub and before you knew it music and dancing would unfold. The hired (or maybe volunteer) musicians would ask, “Is there anyone who would like to offer a song?” The older man at the table by the wall would start singing a beautiful ballad a capella. The young man at the next table would excuse himself from his wife and kids, make his way to the front of the room, pick up a fiddle and start playing an Irish jig. The music would invite the woman at the back to kick off her shoes and start dancing. Then one of the kids at the next table would jump up and join in! Nothing was planned. No one was surprised! Evidently it is normal to find such openness and invitation.
My time in Ireland taught me something about living life at human scale. It seems that the people we encountered knew how to be present to life…their life…however it presented itself. They were open and available in such a way that they were able to show up to the present moment. They addressed human need (our need) whenever and however it arrived. They never seemed to be too rushed, too busy, too inconvenienced to respond to what was right in front of them, be it a tired and hungry traveler or an opportunity for joy. We found one of our hosts conversing with a friend in the den one night. The next morning the man shared with us that he and his friend ended up at the local pub. His friend had surprised him with a visit. It didn’t matter that he had plowed the fields for 12 hours that day. The friend was there and he wasn’t going to miss the opportunity for them to catch up and share a Guinness together! Somehow, the people we encountered had the presence of life to be available for life.
What is human scale?
I was first introduced to the expression “human scale by one of my favorite authors and teachers, Parker Palmer. I heard him say the phrase in a podcast several months ago regarding the way he personally sets his speaking engagements. He stated that the way he schedules his work reflects the work itself. He sifts through requests and responds to them personally, therefore staying in connection with the work and the people instead of having someone else do the scheduling for him. This keeps the work at “human scale.”
Human Scale is originally a term used in architecture when designing spaces for human use. It means to design spaces that “are closely aligned to human measurement and how we see the world.”[1] It is to measure the “size of the building and its parts in relation to the person or people using it. The human scale is perceivable and relatable in relation to the size of a person. Human scale is a scale that feels comfortable and appropriate to a person, for example, steps, doorways, canopies are sized to feel comfortable (not oversized to induce a feeling of being small or undersized to induce a feeling of being large in relation to the built form).”[2]
I am choosing to adapt the term as Parker Palmer did. Hence, for me Human Scale means to live life in relation to people, person to person, in the ways that people relate to one another. It means to focus on life with the people who are right in front of you or are somehow in connection with you, whether for a lifetime or only for a moment. Living life at Human Scale means practicing presence with people and making space for human connection that fits the size of human life.
What might it look like to live life at human scale?
In the world today, we are constantly overwhelmed with news of human devastation. Because of technology, what is happening everywhere is continuously flooding into our personal lives. We often feel we have very little power to make direct significant change in most of these situations. As a result, we may become numb, find ourselves disengaging from life, or become overwhelmed by feelings of fear and sadness. I would call this focusing on life at “world scale.” World Scale can produce an oversized view of the world that can induce feelings and thoughts of being small, insignificant, or powerless.
Living life at human scale returns life to what is doable, to the areas of life with which we have some control and human agency. It puts life within the scale of human to human existence. Such is not to say that we are to become disinterested with people and circumstances beyond a personal view.[1] It is to say that we are to focus on what feels comfortable and appropriate to a person. We do not disconnect from the broader human community because we cannot solve the problems of the world. Rather, living life at human scale begs the question, “What is mine to do?” The answer to that question is each person’s task to discern for themselves.
Being present to life at human scale breaks life down into more manageable, sizable parts. It means that I am allowed to focus on what is "just my size." Although I alone cannot change the world, I can make a difference right here, right now, with the people in my life. Depending on who I am these people may be my family, my neighbors, my co-workers, the person in the grocery line, or the server who brings my meal to the table. As Mother Teresa said, “I alone can’t change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters and create many ripples.”
What are some examples of living life at Human Scale?
Living life at human scale is when…
I say yes to my elderly mom’s need to have her TV reconnected, her phone ringer fixed, and her Alexa rebooted even though I’m ready to get home after taking her to a morning doctor’s appointment followed by a full afternoon of shopping together.
I invite the next door neighbors over for chicken tortilla soup because there is plenty.
my husband politely and caringly assists stressed out travelers who approach him in need of directions at the airport, even though it happens everyday on his lunch break and his job has nothing to do with airport assistance.
you can still laugh with your friends over dinner even though they voted differently from you in the last election.
I stop whatever I am doing when my spouse comes through the door and greet him with a kiss.
the runners and walkers on my local path look at each other and say “Hello!” as they pass.
you stop washing dishes and listen attentively when your 5 year old comes running into the kitchen with a very exciting story of how the Brontosaurus escaped from the T-Rex.
I look the woman in the eye that has just thinly sliced my ham at the deli counter, genuinely saying “Thank you! Have a good weekend!”
the man next to us at the local pizza place gets up from the table because the server has asked if anyone can help her co-worker who has a dead battery out in the parking lot.
You take a moment to send a text saying “I’m thinking of you.” with a heart emoji to a friend who is having a hard week.
Living life at human scale happens every time you practice being present, offering what is yours to offer with the people in your day, making them feel seen, heard, and valued. The interesting thing is that in doing such, you may feel more seen, heard, and valued as well.
Final Thoughts
As I reflect upon my time in Ireland, I realize that the people there have something that I long for. They seem to have a way of being present to their lives that makes room for the both/and…the hardship and the joy…the personal and the relational...the large and the small. Also, they seemingly are not unhinged by unexpected interruptions. In fact, in many ways they appear to welcome such. I experienced with them a way of being present to life as it comes, human encounter by human encounter.
Life as we know it will continue to be full of unsettling news, endless responsibilities, and the unexpected. Such has been and will always be part of life. Yet, when the larger scale of the world overwhelms you, it seems that the antidote just may be to return to the life that is right in front of you. After all, what is within reach is our truest reality. I say, let me return to more of that.
The truth is I have many opportunities to live life at human scale during every ordinary day. I may not say “yes” to every opportunity, but I wonder what my life might be like if I said yes more often? What if I were to set an intention of presence and openness to people as they show up in my life? What if I were to practice living life at human scale by being more open and attentive…more present to my family, my neighbors, my friends, and the strangers that I encounter every day? What if I were more open to the unexpected? What if I were to try living more like what I experienced in Ireland? Would I feel more purpose, more joy? Would I feel more present to my own life, more connected to what it means to be more fully alive?
[3] Please Note: This is not to say that awareness of life at “world scale” is bad. It is to say that we live life or function day to day at “human scale.” In addition to every day human connection, we must also care about what is happening in the world because we are part of the greater human community. On the larger scale our question becomes, “Is there anything that I can do to help the situation?” and then go do that. The point is to not allow the overwhelming nature of life at world scale to shut down what can be gained through living life at human scale.
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